Well okay, I’ll start here. Right at the beginning.
You see I’ve been writing for some time now. I don’t include my schooling days, I was a terrible student.
I discovered words later in life along with what they can do. But even so, each time I open the blank page the same feeling emerges. Ugh, what now.
This isn’t a rant about the creative process though. I don’t care about that. I get paid for what I write and it has nothing to do with creativity. At least not in the artistic sense. Writing is, at any level, a creative process.
What do I write?
I write content for the web mostly. I have been tempted on occasion to try some fiction, some of which you’ll find on this website. But as I said, this isn’t a rant about the creative process. It’s simply words on paper.
If it’s just words on paper though, you may ask, why attempt it at all?
Now that is a good question. This exercise talks about all that. At least it tries.
Obviously, there’s the money aspect. I won’t make any money with this writing though. It’s the writing I hope to do after I’m done here that will. The problem I’m immediately facing is I have no desire to write that which I need to write about. The stuff that makes me money. At least today I don’t.
But I had no desire yesterday. None the day before. Nor the day before that. Frankly, I haven’t had any desire since the beginning of the month. That gets us to the crux of the matter. Why am I taking time to write this stuff when I know I need to write the other stuff?
Well, part of me suggested that if I start writing anything at all, it may prime the pump to make words flow throughout the day. So, here I am writing to an audience of zero (I checked my visitor stats this morning. No change.) vigorously pumping the English language word-well. Is it working?
Hard to say.
In the back of my mind I see the project needing completion. I know if I complete it, I’ll feel so much better. But still, it looms there like some sword of Damocles waiting to cut my content writing career in half. A few bad reviews in this business and you’re toast.
And so, I sit here rattling the keys in search of motivation. I’ll finish this soon, then I’ll find some type of graphic to sit atop it on the blog here and post it. But then what?
That is a very fine question. Frankly, and I don’t have the answer yet. And I won’t until I close this page and see what happens after that.
Will this short work prove the elixir I need to remedy my word-flow malady? One can only hope. I’ll say goodbye for now, and hope we meet again. Soon, I hope. Because maybe sitting here, writing for myself before I write for anybody else, I’ll find the drive to tackle the work that needs to be done. The work that puts food on my table.